We cried for the loss of innocence. I comforted her, saying it was entirely my fault. She had done what any loving mother would do and put the safety of her child before her own emotional needs. We walked in silence down the tree-lined streets, holding each other’s hand, each grieving in our inner solitude. We spoke of what happened the day I died. Why she left before I awoke (three days later). The devastation I faced due to her absence. I told her what memories my Swiss cheese brain had of the events of that fateful day, and we walked on. She spoke of the ultimate joy she felt as new life grew inside her and the crushing loneliness she felt because she couldn’t trust me to share the experience with. She spoke of the laughter Valerie would evoke from her when she kicked. The tears she shed into her pillow because I wasn’t there for her. The pressure exerted on her by well meaning friends and family to give her child up for adoption. They were only acting in her best interest and I. I just find it interesting to see the look on a woman's face when she realizes that not only is she about to be raped but she is going to be killed, too. Of course, by this time I've tied the woman down pretty tightly. I've seen a lot of reactions to my promise of death. Terror is pretty common but I occasionally see relief. One woman fainted. She had such an interesting look on her face when she woke up to find someone having sex with her. I think my favorite reaction was the woman who tried to make the sex last longer.It was with this woman that I started a tradition of asking my victims if they had any final words. I wasn't really being totally serious.Still, I did ask, "Any last words before I kill you?"When I removed her gag, she screamed. I was very disappointed. This did not stop me from continuing to ask if my victims had any last words. I thought it an interesting question. I was hoping one of my victims might say something profound.I don't think there will be much publicity.
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